Sadness

“I am so sleepy today.”

“But you were sleepy yesterday as well.”

“I know.”

*******

She looks out the window while waiting for her tea to cool. She turns to set it down and then decides to climb back into bed. She pulls the blankets over her head to shut out the sounds. A battle between longing to be around others and yet the desire to be left alone. Tears fall from her eyes and stain the pillow. Eventually she falls to sleep and escapes reality.

*******

Today she steps outside onto her balcony and the sun kisses her pale skin. Her heart wakes up and pounds so loudly in her ears. She turns to run back inside and leans against the shut door. How can she ever consider having a child if she can’t even bare to get the mail.

*******

Other days she sets down the tea to pick up the worn Bible on the table. On bent knees she screams silently begging for forgiveness for an unknown sin.

*******

As weeks go by, her husband comes home later and later from work. She never questions because she thinks she already knows the answer. She isn’t angry because she would do the same if she had a wife that took three different medications just to do laundry.

*******

At night she waits until he falls asleep so she can be close to him and feel the calming rise and fall of his chest. She takes his hand in hers and rubs her fingers over the bumps and knots she use to know so well.

*******************************

Had a dream and this is what came from it…..don’t ask me…..blame my subconscious. 

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